Short, Not-So Sweet Advice
Quick Post
I was asked the question “what advice would you go back to tell your younger self?”. Obviously buy Tesla stock at $1.30 dollars is the answer… but the question was seeking guidance and support. I think it’s easy to find articles, posts, images that say “15 rules to live by” or something to this effect…(I can hardly remember 15 names let alone principles to abide by every second of every day–hardly supportive if one is already struggling).
Many posts are very vague and represent a perfect impractical world. Such advice like, “Love always”. Wait, always? To everyone? Love the guy who called you names and egged your house? That’s calling for Stockholm Syndrome
“Never cancel dinner plans with a text message” What if I’m running late and it’s with a friend? I think the cancelling aspect is more important than the method of communication, no? How is this supposed to change my life exactly?
“Never regret anything in life”, well wait a minute, regret is a natural emotion that comes about by being a human being. Should I just start a Valium binge and start removing emotions one by one? Some evidence (Saffrey, Summerville & Roese, 2008) even shows that people value regret far more than other negative emotions.
Or I’ve seen a life lesson post in the same post saying “Not getting what you want is a blessing” and also saying in a separate post “Take what you want every now and then, you deserve it”. Damn it, I’m already confused I don’t need these mixed messages.
Alright you get the point… So what would I say?
I think:
- 1) You have to try to get yourself in a situation to explore the most intellectual opportunities as possible. What this means is that you should try to enrol in school programs/activities that can branch to another field or jobs that are inherently complex so you learn about something else in the process. Most of my university experience was narrow-minded, regurgitated, “stay in your lane” thinking. Additionally, I’ve had a job where I went a little further than my job description on behalf of a patient (at a pharmacy) and was ripped to pieces “cause I’m not supposed to be doing that”. These things are crushing to your self-worth.
It’s much better to absolutely hate a job, but being introduced to a new field or aspect of life that you enjoy or inspire you. Take a course broad enough so it has the ability to connect to something else. Specializing sounds great, but it’s more fulfilling knowing about 10 things at 60% than knowing one thing at 120%. So… –> Seek intellectual growth in something that takes up 20 hours or more a week of your time & don’t remain stagnant for too long - 2) Don’t just listen, like, share or comment what your model does–DO what they do. It’s embarrassing to say… but we both know you have role models that you deeply admire. Every time they post you click onto it.
You respect them for a myriad of reasons but you will pay yourself that same level of respect if you’re doing the exact same thing. This could be starting a website, doing some writing, cooking, physical training, starting a business, fishing, travelling, whatever it is… Maybe you won’t be as good as them, but the point is you’ll be enjoying the process. So… –> START the same thing you love others for doing. - 3) You aren’t owed anything (outside legal contracts ha). I know this is sacrilege to say now but this is the truth of the world. If you’re expecting others to provide for you or someone to look after you, you’re agreeing to be subservient to someone & agreeing to the notion that you require assistance just to live.
You’re not collecting land royalties like a King or Queen– it’s more like collecting allowance cause you’re accepting that you’re still a child. Trying to compete in the world with the expectation of “good things come to me” just doesn’t work. You’ll get eaten alive.
It’s much better to earn your keep and produce a good or service yourself. Do away with the notion that being competitive is “toxic”. Being competitive to strive to win forces you to find solutions in life. It forces you to be competent. It forces you to be dangerous in a given pursuit, and dangerous is a better alternative than weakness. So… –> You don’t deserve free things because the world is ruthless; to conquer the world is to be as competitively ruthless
Like the saying, “It’s better to be a warrior in a garden than a gardener in a war”
Hope these can help you out! Also, a little fact for you is 98.2% who share this and #StayOnTheBall are happier in life
Okay, I made this number up, but please share
